Danger Bakery

A fine baked goods establishment yowling for your attention since 2021

Happy Loafsgiving!

For us at the Danger Bakery, time means nothing and holidays are just another day closer to death. Nevertheless, we’d like to extend a warm-hearted holiday greeting for everyone who has just one thread of soul left inside them to enjoy things such as Loafsgiving–the holiday where you feed your cat whatever they want, no questions asked!

We asked our editors what their favorite foods were, and here are the responses:

“I’m between Dangerloaf’s food or room temperature frying oil from the deep-frying pan. They both have their merits. It’s more delicious if you know you’re going to get caught, of course.”


“Dry crunchies or tube treat. Now, leave me alone.”


“String cheese. I don’t eat it, of course. I just like for my human to pull off a piece and put it on the ground for me to stare at it judgmentally and then come begging back for the rest of the cheese. To be honest, though, anything that’s not… [audible sigh of disgust] Tiny Tiger. Blech.”


Happy Loafsgiving!

Anyone caught not participating can and will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law, including but not limited to, death.

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